Regrets – Will they define you or refine you?


We were driving home from spending Christmas with family. Several hours into the eight-hour trip, my husband suddenly turned to me and asked, “What are your regrets from this year?”

The question caught me off guard.


He went on to explain that he had been scrolling through social media and came across multiple posts where people were listing their regrets from the past year. After pausing for a moment, he shared, “I can’t think of any major regrets.”


That got me thinking.

What are my regrets from this year?

Do I even have any?

I do.


There are many times I could have responded better to a person or a situation. I’m sure I didn’t seize every opportunity that could have changed my life for the better.

But I’m not all about living in a way that focuses on my regrets.


I will learn from them, I hope. I will maybe recognize them if they try to resurface this next year, allowing me to avoid making the same mistakes. But overall, I am going to embrace them for what they are – an opportunity to learn and grow.


The best teacher I’ve ever had is failure. I learn more when I mess something up than if I’d done it all right.

I make poor choices.

I let people down.

I choose the wrong path.


And I understand that these are all steps in shaping me into a better version of me.

Maybe you’ve already posted a list of regrets on social media for all to see. Maybe you haven’t done that, but the soundtrack that is playing constantly in your head is one of regrets. Maybe you can’t get past where our world and society are today.

There’s a quote that has surfaced in my life repeatedly, and it’s a quote that I am going to use to help shape this next year.  You may have heard it before – it’s from a guy named Mahatma Ghandi…


Be the change you want to see in the world.


Do we all have regrets? Yes.

Are they all major? No.

I am not going to allow regrets to define me.


But I am willing to let regrets be the catalyst of change that needs to happen in my life so that I may become more of who God wants me to be.


Will yours define you or refine you?


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